Alex Hope Read online

  Alex Hope

  AJ Estelliam

  Chapter 1

  ‘Alex!’

  The voice called my name repeatedly.

  ‘Alex!’

  I couldn’t open my eyes. They felt heavy…too tired to even blink.

  ‘Alex! Can you hear me?’ the familiar voice asked.

  I wanted to say yes, but when I tried to move my mouth I found I couldn’t. What was going on?

  ‘She’ll wake up when she’s ready to,’ a female voice then spoke. ‘Don’t worry too much…she’s stable-doing much better.’

  I would have frowned if I had been able to move my face. Stable? Much better? What on earth was going on?

  I racked my brain for the last thing I could remember. What had I been doing? Where had I been? I couldn’t think…everything was foggy inside. I tried to form coherent thoughts and realised I could. I knew who I was-I was Alex Hope. I knew my age-thirty-one. I knew I worked as a police researcher and I could picture my friends and family…what I couldn’t figure out was what the hell had happened to me.

  ‘What if she’s brain damaged?’

  The sentence rushed through my head as my panicked girlfriend voiced her thoughts.

  ‘I’ll be stuck caring for a cripple,’ she continued, shocking me immensely.

  I blinked rapidly and managed to open my eyes. I blinked until I could focus and then saw her. It was my partner; my girlfriend…and she was sat in the seat beside me staring into the distance.

  ‘I don’t want to be stuck with her,’ she said, but her mouth didn’t move. I would have stared at her open-mouthed if I had control of my face.

  ‘I just want to be with Jenna now. I should have left Alex before we started sleeping together.’

  I stared at the woman who I had thought I had known so well. The words were clear but they were not spoken. They were thoughts. As I lay there, immobile, I wondered what had happened to me and why it was that I could suddenly hear my cheating girlfriend’s thoughts.

  At that moment, she turned to look at me. I watched as her eyes widened as she saw I was awake.

  ‘Alex!’ she exclaimed, moving to my side immediately. ‘Alex, you’re awake!’

  I tried to move my mouth but my lips were too dry to speak. All that came out was a muffled groan.

  ‘Alex! Don’t move! I’ll get the doctors!’

  I watched her as she hurried out to get help. I wasn’t sure why she was bothering though; she clearly didn’t love me anymore if she was cheating on me with someone called Jenna!

  The doctors came in and there was a sudden hive of activity around me. They checked my vitals and wrote things down about me. I was helped to move into a sitting position and given water to sip. It was all very overwhelming, and I wanted to know everything straight away.

  ‘What happened to me?’ I asked the doctor, as soon as I could.

  ‘You were in an accident,’ he told me.

  ‘What kind of accident?’

  ‘You don’t remember?’ he asked.

  I thought for a moment, racking my brain. As I went silent, he didn’t. He looked at me, his lips unmoving but his thought process was running fast. ‘Her vitals are good…no sign of internal damage…. responsive, clear and intelligent in speech…’

  ‘I’m sorry…did you say something?’ I asked him frowning.

  ‘No…I asked you if you remembered the accident?’

  I shook my head. ‘I, uh…no…’

  ‘What is the last thing you do remember?’

  ‘The last thing I remember…I was in my car…’

  He nodded.

  ‘Did I have a car accident?’ I wondered.

  ‘Yes…you did.’

  ‘Oh…’

  ‘You were brought here over twenty-four hours ago and we put you into a coma to protect your brain. It seems you’ve been very lucky,’ he commented, eyeing me closely.

  He was right. I had been. As he stared at me with kind eyes, I could hear his mind still…he had been in many situations where patients hadn’t been lucky like me and he was reliving one of them as he looked at me.

  ‘I, uh…did I damage my brain?’ I asked.

  ‘No, not that we can see. You’re talking, coherent and don’t seem to be suffering any ill effects from the bump to the head. I feel confident you’ll make a full recovery.’

  ‘Oh, right! Well…’ I trailed off. Should I tell him I had woken able to hear people’s thoughts? I decided no…I would sound crazy and I wanted to get out of hospital as soon as possible. If I told him what was going on, he would give me tests and I would have to keep seeing medical professionals. They may even think I was crazy. I wouldn’t say anything.

  ‘When can I go home?’ I asked him.

  ‘Well, we’ll need to run a few tests. We may need to do another CT scan to check everything is as it should be…I’d say in a few days.’

  ‘Okay,’ I nodded, taking this in.

  ‘I’ll let you rest now…and I think your friend is keen to see you…’ he said, glancing to where my partn stood waiting at the door.

  ‘Thanks,’ I murmured.

  ‘You’re very welcome.’

  I watched him walk off and then saw Lauren watching me closely. I could hear her as she sat down. She was running through the well-scripted lies she had sculpted about the night I had been in the accident.

  ‘I’m so glad you’re awake,’ she said to me, reaching for my hand and smiling happily.

  Her words spoke untruths as I could hear her true feelings now. ‘Really?’

  ‘Of course! I was so worried!’ she exclaimed, kissing my hand.

  I couldn’t help but stare at her with a stony expression.

  ‘I have been waiting and waiting for you to wake up!’ she told me, but it was more lies. I heard the truth-‘she’ll never know where I was. She couldn’t. She’ll just think I was here the whole time, waiting for her to wake up.’

  ‘So, where were you?’ I asked her.

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘I mean the night of the accident. You weren’t home and it was late. I was worried about you,’ I told her.

  I heard her before she spoke. She had been in bed with the other woman; a woman who she desired very deeply from the illicit thoughts which quickly rushed through her head. ‘I uh…I got stuck in a meeting at work and then I stayed late to write the report. I did try to text you but I had trouble with getting signal.’

  Her lying knew no bounds. ‘Cut the crap, Lauren,’ I told her.

  She gasped. ‘What?’

  ‘I said-cut the crap. You’re lying.’ I spoke quietly but my meaning was clear. I was angry now.

  ‘Alex!’

  ‘You weren’t at work,’ I stated.

  ‘Yes, I was,’ she lied, but her cheeks turned pink and I could see unease creep in as her thoughts filled my head. ‘Does she know? How could she know? Maybe I should just finish this and be with Jenna,’ her inner monologue ranted.

  ‘No…don’t bother carrying on lying though, Lauren as I’ll save you the trouble. Do one…leave…this is over. I’m finishing with you for cheating on me. Now get out of here. I don’t ever want to see you again.’

  ‘But Alex!’ she exclaimed, regret filling her features.

  ‘No, I’m serious. This is over…I know now and it’s not something I can live with or could even consider accepting. Leave…before I ask medical staff to have you removed.’

  She stared at me for a long moment. ‘How did you know?’ she almost whispered.

  I shrugged a little. ‘It’s written all over your face,’ I told her.

  ‘But how?’ she pushed.

  I met her eyes. ‘You told me unwittingly.’

  ‘I did?’

  I nodded.

  ‘I’m sorry
, Alex. I never meant to hurt you.’

  ‘Keep lying, Lauren…just keep lying. You’re the one who will end up being hurt one day.’ An image flashed through my head of Lauren crying and I didn’t know why but somehow, I knew that this relationship she was in was doomed in the future. What on earth was happening to me? I wondered. I could not only hear thoughts but I was seeing future events? I shook my head, confused.

  ‘Please leave.’

  ‘Okay…I’m sorry, Alex.’

  ‘Yeah whatever…see you later, Lauren. I’ll be happier without you.’

  She stared at me sadly and then turned and left without another word. I lay in the stark, sterile hospital room feeling bereft.

  Some hours later, I was struggling to come to terms with the change in my personal situation. I had woken up to a new, strange life. I could hear people’s thoughts and in doing so, had lost my partner. I was now alone and feeling empty, without prospects for the future.

  I sighed and closed my eyes, lying back against the pillow. As I drifted, an image floated through my mind. It was a woman; I knew that much. All I could really see were her eyes though, and they were exquisite. They were a bright, crystal green yet one had a flicker of brown in it. Her eyes were extraordinary and they were smiling at me warmly.

  Panicked thoughts startled me out of my reverie and into a lighter sleep.

  ‘Oh my God! Look at her face! My poor, battered child!’

  ‘Hey Mum,’ I said, without opening my eyes.

  ‘Alex! Oh goodness, honey! You know how to scare me, don’t you?’

  ‘Sorry Mum…it was an accident.’

  ‘You need to go more carefully!’ she told me as tears slipped down her cheeks. ‘You could be brain damaged or disabled by now! You’ve been so lucky!’ she cried and as she clasped my hand and kissed my cheek, I heard from her thoughts just how much she loved me and how dear to her heart I was.

  ‘I’m sorry for scaring you, Mum. I’m fine though! Just look at me! Back to normal.’

  ‘You look battered and bruised, honey. You’ll come home with me so I can take care of you, right?’ she questioned.

  I looked up at her hopefully. ‘Really?’

  ‘Yes! You’d want to?’ she asked. Her thoughts betrayed her shock that I would want to come and stay with her for longer than a few hours.

  ‘I’d love to come home, Mum,’ I smiled.

  She took my hand in hers and I felt the warmth of her love surround me.

  Chapter 2

  The next forty-eight hours were overwhelming for me. I was stuck in hospital and had been moved to a ward. All around me patients and visitors came and went and with them brought their issues with them. My new-found skill had me tearing my hair out. It was one of those things that sounded great in theory-being able to hear other people’s thoughts-but in theory, it was awful. My head pounded as I lay in bed, with my eyes closed. What I heard was not spoken; it was thought and it came in disjointed, muddled form.

  I reached my hand to my forehead and rubbed at my headache. I was sick of other people and their problems.

  ‘Hey honey,’ a voice said beside me.

  I opened my eyes in surprise and saw my father stood beside me. His voice was real and he was smiling. ‘Hi Dad! Boy am I glad to see you!’ I exclaimed.

  ‘I’ll bet! Hospitals are the worst, right?’ he grinned, laying a hand on my arm.

  ‘Yeah! It’s been a living hell! Tell me you’re here to take me home?’

  ‘I am,’ he smiled. ‘Let’s get you discharged!’

  ‘Really?’ I said brightening. ‘I’m actually getting out of here?’

  ‘Yes, honey. Apart from being battered and bruised, the doctors say you’re suffering from no ill-effects from your accident…’

  I remained silent. I didn’t want to shatter the illusion that I was normal.

  ‘So, we can get moving…’

  ‘Brilliant! Have you got any clothes for me?’

  ‘Yes…here you are…I’ll go and speak to the doctor while you get dressed. I need to fill out some forms.’

  ‘Okay, thanks Dad.’

  ‘I’ll be back in a minute,’ he promised.

  While he was gone, I got myself dressed and then sat on the side of the bed waiting. I watched the woman in the next bed lying there talking to her boyfriend. It was frustrating for me as he thought the world of her and yet she was already seeing someone else. I shook my head and turned away, trying to turn their thoughts off in my head. It was agonising hearing everyone’s inner-most thoughts…especially when they were lies.

  ‘You all set?’

  I looked up, surprised. I hadn’t heard my Dad coming.

  ‘Yeah…’

  ‘Come on then. We’re going home.’

  ‘Brilliant, let’s go!’ I exclaimed, getting up, feeling positive suddenly.

  We headed out hand in hand, and made our way to the car.

  Going home to my parent’s house was great. It was fantastic to be away from so many strangers and to have people who loved me around me. The trouble was, I was now still faced with my new talent. Even though it was my parents, it was still frustrating and I found I now knew them on a whole new level.

  On the first day of being back home, I was sat with my Dad in the lounge when I began to hear his thoughts and troubles. It was mainly centred around work, which was a relief because I didn’t want to hear anything about my parents which involved them being unhappy with each other. Thankfully, it seemed they were okay in that area.

  ‘So, how’s work been?’ I asked my Dad, changing the subject away from me. We had been talking about my next steps but I was tired of talking about myself.

  ‘Oh, well, it’s work, isn’t it…it’s as it always is…’ he murmured, frowning.

  ‘You look stressed, Dad,’ I commented, hoping he would open-up to me.

  He nodded and then looked off, outside the window and into the distance. ‘I’m fine, honey. I’ve just been snowed under so I’m pretty tired,’ he said.

  He wasn’t lying but he wasn’t telling the truth about how bad things had become for him. He was beyond miserable but because my mother had retired, he was stuck in his job having to provide for them both. It was a source of constant misery and endless contemplation for him.

  ‘Are you able to take time out at all? Have you been doing your wood work?’ I asked him.

  He nodded. ‘Whenever possible,’ he murmured, ‘but opportunity is few and far between. I’ve been working long hours.’

  ‘I’m sorry, Dad.’

  He shrugged. ‘It is what it is…’

  I watched him for a moment and heard his dreams out loud. He dreamed of leaving his dead-end job where he was miserable and ordered around by a man half his age with an attitude problem. He dreamed of leaving and setting up his own little business, making his woodwork games which were so beautifully created that I knew he would be successful.

  ‘You should just do it, Dad.’

  ‘What?’ he asked.

  ‘What you think about…’

  He looked at me strangely. ‘How do you know what I think about?’

  ‘I don’t,’ I said, flushing, ‘but I can guess. I mean it’s obvious, isn’t it? You leave the job which is making you miserable and sell your woodwork.’

  He shook his head sadly. ‘I don’t think I would make enough,’ he told me.

  I thought about this for a moment. For some reason, I felt sure that he would-and in fact be better off financially as well as mentally.

  ‘I just think you should look into it, you know? You never know, right?’

  ‘Well, perhaps…we’ll see…’

  ‘Don’t wait too long, Dad. I think you could be happier than right now,’ I told him.

  ‘I’ll look into it,’ he promised me. ‘Hey, do you want to see my latest work?’ he asked, brightening.

  ‘Yeah! Definitely!’

  ‘You stay there. I’ll go and get it.’

  When he came back, I was onc
e again floored by his talent. He had made a beautiful wooden board and created a game from his imagination. It was just one of many beautifully hand-crafted wooden games which he had made. I knew he could sell them and earn well. I just had to convince him to go for it.

  Later that day, I stood in the kitchen with my Mum who was making dinner.

  ‘Mum?’

  ‘Yes honey?’

  ‘I’m a little worried about Dad,’ I told her.

  She turned to me and frowned. ‘Dad? Why?’ she asked, looking surprised.

  ‘I don’t think he’s very well…’

  ‘Well? Your Dad is healthy as a horse! I don’t think there’s anything wrong with him, honey! What makes you say that?’

  ‘I don’t mean in a physical way, Mum…I mean mentally…’

  ‘You think your Dad is mentally unwell?’

  ‘I think he’s miserable. I think he needs to leave his job,’ I told her.

  ‘Alex-we depend on his wage right now. We can’t not have one salary coming in!’

  ‘I know, Mum…but I don’t think he is having a good time at work. He seems different lately. I just think-couldn’t he pursue selling his games? I mean if he sold them for a good price, he could still bring money in by doing something he liked!’

  I heard my Mum’s thoughts. She didn’t think he could do it. She didn’t think he could make enough for his creations.

  ‘Mum, he could make money from them! I’m sure of it!’

  ‘I don’t know, Alex…’

  ‘Well, I think he could…just…well, please Mum, just keep an eye on him will you?’ I requested.

  ‘You’re really that concerned about him?’ she asked.

  I nodded. ‘I really am.’

  ‘Okay then, honey. Thanks for mentioning it.’

  I nodded. ‘I’m going to go upstairs for a bit.’

  ‘Okay…dinner will be in about an hour.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  I went upstairs to my childhood bedroom which I was staying in. I settled down on the bed and closed my eyes. As I did so, I drifted a little and I heard a laugh- a feminine sound which attracted me to its source. I felt myself slip into sleep with a consciousness I wasn’t used to. It was then that I saw her again, and this time it was more clearly-maybe because the room around me was quiet and there was peace in my little sanctuary. Bright, green eyes with the tiny flecker of brown flickering in one brightly. I stared at her and tried to make out the rest of her features. She was blurry and unclear though.